I am puke
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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