Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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