I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Randomize
