remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Randomize
