I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
You don't have asthma, your pregnant
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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