New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize
