i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Randomize
