I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Randomize
