I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Randomize
