i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
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