i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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