Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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