I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
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