he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
My phone has seen less use in the last three days than Tom Brady's condoms.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize