grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Randomize
