Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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