he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
