sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize