I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
last night I used snow as a chaser
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Randomize