so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
Randomize
