For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize
