Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
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