Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I woke up this morning with 2 australian chicks passed out in my living room, a whole bunch of coke on my kitchen counter and I have no idea how the fuck either thing got there
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Randomize
