The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Randomize
