I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
A bitchslap is in order.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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