I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
