I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
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