You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
That accounts for only three of the penises
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
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