K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
i just had sex bonerless
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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