Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
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