i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
It's official drugs can't kill me
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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