don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
This is the high leading the old right now
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
