Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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