what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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