I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
Randomize
