next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
