I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Randomize
