So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
