I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
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