If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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