Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
