i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
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