Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
I think I won the penis lottery.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize