so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
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