shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
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