You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
Randomize
