so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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