i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
