just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
