you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize
