i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
Randomize
